Wanna know why I am not doing my homework? Sure you do! I am dreaming about all the massive amount of money that is coming to me. Yep. I am a millionaire! My junk mail box says so. Lots of times! I am so excited, I am not sure what I am going to do with all my money. Maybe I can buy my way out of school by donating a huge chunk of the money that is coming my direction.
Robert Mueller of the FBI sent me an email. Yep he did. He personally is overseeing the ATM card payment that I am going to receive. Isn't that awesome? Our government IS watching out for us :). All I have to do is send a money gram of $200 and I will get my LOADED ATM card of $800,000.00! WOW, I think that is a great return! Oh, and I do get back that $200. Wow, what should I buy with all that money.
Oh, but that is not all! No sir-ree Bob. We seem to have some relatives, unbeknownst to us, that have left us some money. Yep. Lots of it. Millions! A.W.E.S.O.M.E! I just have to get in touch with the people and give them some information and then they will put the money in my account. Isn't that nice of them. People in London, and Nigeria...who would have thought we had relatives there? Wow!
But, Mrs. Cindy May is trying to take my money. I got an email stating that she said we were dead and that we left her as the beneficiary to (USD)$21.5million. I don't think I am dead since I am typing this? Look, I just come into a lot of money and what happens, people from out of nowhere start trying to take my money from me. Well, it is a good thing I have an FBI contact that I can call or email. I am sure he will help me out.
Not only am I the beneficiary to this massive amount of money, I seemed to have hit the jackpot lately. Let's see my junk mail box says I have won a Dell Laptop. SWEET, I would like a new laptop, how'd they know? Oh, there are new neighbors that live near me that somehow got a hold of my email address and would like to meet me. I wonder if they found out about my money and they are going to try to scam me? Hmmmm, I better not meet them after all. LOTS of cards from secret admirers. Could it be my new neighbor trying to hook up with me? Maybe he does not know I am married. I have a trip to Italy awaiting me.
Seriously, when did I get so lucky to have all these things come my way. It is a good thing I checked my junk email box or I might not get my money, my trip, my new laptop. I am also grateful to be made aware of those that are trying to scam me.
4 comments:
You too?!? We're so dang lucky!
Also, my emails keep telling me I need a bigger member to make all the ladies happy. Whatever could they mean?
You get that one as well? WOW! I had a ton of those and I could not figure out what they meant as well.
Well, I have a 'sweet single senior' near me ready for dates. Not sure how to tell Guy about his competition. When you get all that money, let them know I could use some, too.
Haha! Hilarious!!
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