Hmmmm.....could the well of tears be drying up? I don't think it is, I just think my Aunt Flo left, but I am sure she will be back next month, just like she has been since....oh, 20+ years. I think I have better control over my emotions. Example....today I dropped Brent off at the airport and the bus dropping off the LDS missionaries was there. Lots of young elders and sisters preparing to embark upon their two year adventure to serve the Lord. As I drove pass them, my thoughts couldn't help but turn to Garrett and where he would be a month from now. I looked at these elders and sisters and thought, "Are they nervous? Are they scared? Are they homesick?" I also wondered, "How many moms and dads were watching their young son or daughter from afar, making sure they make their connections, making sure they have enough money...just to catch a glimpse of them." If it were me, I would want to park my car and just watch from afar; just get a glimpse. I am sure I will think better of this in a month. I am sure that in a month I am going to say, "Garrett who?" Just kidding, I won't....not with the way I have been so far.
I truly am excited for Garrett and the opportunity he has to serve the people of Florida. They are blessed to have a such a wonderful young man come and share the gospel with them. I know that there is a life in Florida (or Mississippi, Alabama or Georgia) that he needs to touch. Garrett has always had a gift of talking with others and making them feel like they have known each other for years; Garrett is really good at making friends. Garrett is going to do wonderful things for the next two years, I am sure of that!
I will definitely miss that kid, he has been a blessing to have around. All three of my children are wonderful blessings to have around. All three of my children are awesome friends. You know the saying, "You don't realize what you have until it is gone?" Well that has been my problem, I realize what I do have and it (he) is not gone yet. The tears I have cried have been tears of sadness for myself. I guess you can say selfish tears. But they are tears of happiness because I know Garrett is doing what he should be doing.
So don't get me wrong, I support Garrett's decision of going on an LDS mission. I know he will be a fantastic missionary. I am super proud of Garrett and the decision he has made to serve a mission. I am proud of him that he has chosen to spend two years of his life sharing the gospel.
I will truly miss Garrett and the awesome young man he has turned out to be. I will still cry...why, because i am his mom and I will always worry about him, but above all, I will miss him. The tears will still be here and they may flow. But I think if you ask me how I am doing today, you won't get the emotional wreck that you would have seen two days ago. But give me a month, once my aunt has made her monthly visit, I may be on that not-so-fun emotional roller coaster ride again.
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